Male Victims of Abuse: Coming Forward

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We often hear about women being victims of abuse yet 1 in 3 victims of abuse are male. So why do we hear about this less?

According to the Office for National Statistics (ONS), 49% of male abuse victims fail to tell anyone about their abuse and are 2 and half times less likely to tell someone than female victims. Of those who do come forward, often the first person they will tell is a confidential helpline rather than someone they’re close to.

For example, The ManKind Initiative, a charity dedicated to male domestic abuse victims, reported that 61% of men who called their helpline had never spoken to anyone about their abuse before and 64% said they would not have called the helpline if it wasn’t anonymous.

These statistics sadly show that there’s still more to be done to help male victims of abuse.

If you’d like confidential advice and support about abuse, please reach out. Our patient and empathetic team can point you towards specialist support services suited to you.

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Patrice Evra opens up about Child Abuse

Former Manchester United defender, Patrice Evra has recently spoken about sexual abuse he suffered as a child in his new autobiography.

Evra was just 13 years old when he was sexually abused by a school teacher when he was staying at his house.

Now aged 40, Patrice has only just opened up about his child abuse, despite being approached by the police when he was 24 after the teacher in question faced allegations of abuse. Evra admits that he was in denial at the time and has since regretted not revealing his experiences.

Evra had only previously confided in his finance, Margaux Alexandra but has since told his mum who encouraged him to report his abuse.

He hopes that talking about his experience will encourage more victims to come forward. In his book, ‘I love this Game’, he writes “If you are a child reading this and you are being abused, you must talk. Don’t carry your shame because there is no shame. Deal with your nightmare by talking about it.”

Why do Men Take Longer to Talk about Abuse?

There can be a lot of reasons why men are reluctant to tell people about abuse. Gender stereotypes make us assume that many men can’t and don’t get abused by women but sadly it happens far more than we realise and can take many different forms.

Victims can experience feelings of shame and embarrassment, and many worry about not being taken seriously or believed at all.

If the abuse happened in childhood, sometimes victims can repress their feelings and memories long into adulthood, leading to many never dealing with their trauma and getting the closure they need.

Of those who do confide in someone close to them, many can still be reluctant to report their abuse to the police despite being encouraged to do so.

Spotting the Signs

Every case of abuse will be different and it’s not always easy to notice the signs. If you’re worried about someone close to you being abused, here are some things to look out for:

  • Appearing scared or anxious of their partner
  • Changes in their personality e.g. becoming withdrawn
  • Having to check in with their partner regularly
  • Alcohol or substance abuse
  • Mental health disorders e.g. depression, anxiety or PTSD

Support for Abuse

If you or someone you know has experienced abuse, please know that there is support out there and you will be listened to. There are charities and support helplines dedicated to helping men who have experienced abuse.

They include:

Our Abuse Solicitors can also offer you advice and support. Please get in touch for a confidential chat.

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