Is Our Divorce Damaging Our Children?
When couples divorce, finances and how they are split are always a contentious issue. However, if there are children involved, they can often get forgotten in the crossfire
or used as weapons against each other.
A High Court judge has spoken out about this battle of the ex- partners and highlighted the effects that a divorce can have on the children
What is the Evidence?
A survey has revealed the devastating effects
of divorce on children.
Some of these figures include:
- 1 in 4 separating couples believe there is no negative impact on their child caused by the split
- 75% believe that there relationship with their child is unaffected
- Most parents reported a marked deterioration in their child’s education, emotional state and general behaviour
Alarming as these figures are, so many parents still refuse to acknowledge the harm
that a messy divorce can have on their children.
What is Being Done About This?
Sir Paul Coleridge, founder of the Marriage Foundation
, has condemned the “dangerous levels of ignorance” shown by parents in regards to their children’s feelings during a split.
Back in 2010, Families Need Fathers expressed their opinion on the damaging effects of separation and divorce on children. They stated that if a child’s mother tells the child that their other parent is worthless, that in turn makes the child feel worthless
, creating future problems with self-esteem.
Sir Coleridge set up the Marriage Foundation to highlight the impact of family break ups and they hope to further highlight the impact on children of those break ups
when the survey results are later announced at a conference run by the charity.
What Can Be Done To Stop This?
Break ups can’t always be prevented and sometimes couples grow apart. However, when children are involved it can get complicated. Regardless of the situation, if your child is in no real danger seeing the other parent they should be allowed to do so
Parenting while separating is not an easy task and there are facilities out there that can help you to be great parents apart.
The Children Need Contact Centres Campaign is championing the important role that these centres do – trying to keep children in contact with parents
or reintroduce them to a parent they have been apart from for a period of time.
Children generally do better with both parents present
and active in their lives and contact centres can help parents to do this while going through a separation. To be referred to a contact centre you can ask a solicitor while going through your divorce
. They will help you fill out the necessary paperwork to make sure the process goes as smoothly as possible.